The First Move

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If I see something I like, I go and get it! Men don't always have to make the first move. Women shouldn't feel like they have to hide their desires under discrete flirting and sexy looks. It's such a waste of time. I don't understand how women get excited when men try to win their affection:

Sexuality expert Paul Jackson writes in The Link:
“There is always a tension [in cultures like ours where romance and sexual relations are accepted as important and crucial to our identities] before you make known your interest in someone you’re sweet on. I had an old friend who said that the minute you asked someone out for coffee, the romance was over: it was the tension of not knowing whether you would be accepted that fuelled your passion. Accepted or rejected, the fun was over.”

This is a very bizarre concept for me to grasp. I don't call this romance or fun. If anything, it is frustrating trying to figure out someone feels about you. "Tension" is uncomfortable and awkward.

We need to stop playing these games and cut to the chase. Tell the person how you really feel and ask them out! But relationship correspondent for AskMen.com says being so straightforward with your feelings is dangerous and makes you look weak. She thinks an open heart makes women look vulnerable and weak. It will definitely put you at risk of getting hurt, but an open heart is absolutely essential if you wish to have an emotional connection with someone.

Videojug.com created a video tutorial on how to make the first move. Not surprisingly, the video depicts an awkward looking man trying to pick up a shy woman. Conversely, the site offers a video for shy woman that explains how to get men to approach them. This totally reaffirms the double standard.

But a good example of a woman breaking this double standard is on Sex and the City. Miranda and Steve love each other, but don't have the courage to tell one another. They are both seeing other people, but still go to dinner together and flirt with one another here and there. Finally, Miranda can't take it anymore and confesses her love to Steve. In just three words, Miranda and Steve stopped playing their little games and started dating again. It's so simple!

Miranda tells it like it is: